As the leaves turn and the air grows crisp, we enter a beautiful season of reflection on faith, gratitude, and community. This time of year brings with it the cherished tradition of homecoming, a celebration that unites past and present students in schools and universities. It's a time to celebrate school spirit, reconnect with friends, and reflect on shared experiences and values. Homecoming is a time to gather with those who established the community before us, carrying forward their legacy. This legacy might be one we cherish or one we wish to redefine, but it provides a foundation—a way of being and doing together that we can pause to remember and have the opportunity to carry something forward. My small town in Central Florida has given me this gift of legacy. It has given me the opportunity to carry forward community.

For the past 11 years, I have marked October as a time to start anew. October 26 was the day Brad, my husband, passed away, forcing me to begin a new life without him. This journey began with sorrow, reflection, and determination. I was determined to hold onto God and, amidst my grief and lack of understanding, find answers to how God made the world to work. I struggled with why I didn’t get the chance to have the family life I always wanted. Why did I not get to live in community as a wife and mother to my three kids? Instead, I get to navigate life as a widow and mother to my children. Oftentimes, this feels like a lonely road even in the middle of a good community of people. Community is essential to my moving forward in life every day. Community is essential in all our lives.  We need each other.   

PAUSE:  What are you learning about being with God, yourself, and others in this season?

Every October, I pause to reflect on the past year, guided by Christ's words in Matthew 22:37-39. Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Over the last year, how have I connected with God, myself, and my neighbor?

This year, the convergence of my reflection time and the homecoming season led me to think more deeply about why and how I am in community. I found myself watching the local high school homecoming parade, attending a football game, and taking pictures of my son and his friends in our quaint city's downtown before they headed to a dance. In the midst of all this, I missed Brad. It’s a normal, good missing. It has taken me years to figure out where I fit in when where I am is not where I want to be. I am not a victim in this situation, but I do have to reconcile the missing person, the void created.

I have never fully understood why God says we are responsible for widows and orphans. We are responsible for those in need. What about others whose needs might be greater than mine as a widow? Perhaps we are to stand in the gap, in the void of injustice when a life is taken before its needs are fulfilled. Perhaps there is a vulnerability that needs covering. I constantly move between providing and nurturing. The rhythms and habits have become something I have adjusted to over the years. I can become mentally exhausted and physically worn, sometimes on edge trying to meet needs I never anticipated when Brad and I had three children. And still, I know what God says I need to bring to my community. I have a responsibility to pass on a legacy myself—an understanding of God evident in truth, goodness, and beauty, as seen in the life of Christ, the Holy Spirit, and all of His creation, including community.

PAUSE:  What are you learning about being with God, yourself, and others in this season?

Who makes up my community? Where do I fit in community? I have a guide for understanding who and where I fit into community.  Each depth of relationship has a different level of commitment, expectations, trust, and feeling of safety.  I meet people regularly, they are acquaintances. They are, in the grocery store, gas station, and walking down the street.  All are God's creation and deserve kindness and consideration. I have a wonderful network of social friends whom I appreciate dearly. Among my many social friends, there are a few kindred spirits, near and far, whom I have time to keep up with regularly. Among these kindred spirits, a few have become like family. I do daily life with them, not necessarily every day, but I make myself available to intentionally give and receive, working together toward something greater than just ourselves. These are the people who must be the safest place. Safety meaning feeling valued, supported, reassured, and comforted. We are not able to be all things to all people, we have God for that. But, we can be intentional about knowing whom our community is, where we connect, to what depth we connect.

In a time when safety feels threatened daily, with constant school lockdowns and threats of violence, people being cancelled and treated without kindness or respect, it is necessary to find a place of safety—first with God, then within ourselves, and finally within a community. We need to find our community. We need to work together with like-minded individuals, with God, toward a legacy of truth, goodness, beauty, and nobility, to honor God and Christ who lives in us, and to pass on hope and joy in life.

Pause:  How have you lived in love the last year by connecting in community?

In our pursuit of personal comfort, we often shield ourselves from all discomfort. Yet, this constant ease can leave our souls restless and unfulfilled.

Our lives were designed for a different kind of comfort—one that may tire our bodies but brings deep peace to our souls. This comfort comes from aligning with our true purpose: working alongside God and others in community.

Embracing this way of life means accepting moments of discomfort. It might mean pushing our bodies as we serve, challenging our minds as we grow in faith, or stretching our hearts as we build deeper relationships. These challenges shape us and bring the soul-deep comfort we crave.

This is the legacy we're called to pass on—a way of living that values soul comfort over bodily ease, finding joy in purposeful work and community engagement. It's a lifestyle that honors how we were created to be, bringing glory to God through our active participation in His plans.

This season is a time to reflect on homecoming. Where are you learning to be with God? Where are you learning to be with self? Where are you learning to be with others?